Today, I had a conversation with a potential client about how dating advice is so convoluted and overwhelming.
She said, "There is just so much relationship advice out there. I don't know who to believe." She went on to say, "You have to not be too eager by replying right away, but maybe the right ones won't care. You can't scare them away by being too forward, but you also don't want games."
You hear from professionals that you need to be patient with people, BUT ALSO... you shouldn't put up with people's crap. You shouldn't be with someone until they are emotionally ready, BUT ALSO, you can grow together.
It's hard to know who to listen to. It is CONFUSING! Do I listen to this relationship expert from a blog post, or this therapist from a podcast? Do I show up full force, or do I start off easy and "hard to get?"
I listened intently and nodded my head, as I have been through it all 100x before.
And then I had an epiphany... Sifting through relationship advice is kind of like demystifying nutrition advice.
There are so many people spouting different ideologies everywhere you look.
- Keto, Paleo, Vegan, Intermittent Fasting - "They will all be your answer."
But, if you listened to everyone, and tried to implement all of those diets at once, you would wind up on the couch, eating only dry lettuce between 12-8pm, with no energy, sex drive, or will to live.
I took a deep breath and gave her my best advice. "You can't listen to everyone. You have to find one person who you respect and trust, and give their way a try. We live in a world of information overload, with 'specialists,' and books on everything. Find something/someone, and stick to it/them for a while. You know in your gut what is right for you."
You need to learn to listen to your intuition.
If waiting 3 hours to text a guy back, or to eat breakfast when you are hungry, doesn't feel right, don't do it. And, if you need advice, follow the professionals who you feel in your gut, you can connect with.
The answers are never external. They will become clearer when you sit still, and take a deep breath.
"What is right for me?"
Oh ya... and why is dating like dieting? They both suck ;).
Good luck in the dating and dieting world. If you need help with nutrition without dieting, and want to laugh at bad dating app stories with me, book a free call with me today!